Wonder in India

February 2, 2007

Looking out at the most beautiful desert mountains filled with ancient rock formations, old temples, and caves, I wonder. So much has happened over time. Saints and kings, Muslims, Hindus, and Jains, war and deep peace, I wonder, where do I fit? Have I been here before? How many times? Why have I returned?

In this world with so much injustice, the balance seems dangerously to the negative side. I can feel the immense negativity in me. Wanting all my life to know the truth of my being, fighting the resistance in me, seeing how much I identify with this human life, wanting comfort, safety and meaning, longing to be nice, sing sweet, do good things and yet falling short of amazing potential within me.

That’s why I sit here in this holy land this time around. I found a tour guide, someone who knows the way in. The road is hot and dusty, the elements unpredictable. There is something inside me that has always been, that is moving my feet, beating my heart, and breathing my breath. That something, this guide, this lifetime, mysteriously combining and playing as I sit in wonder.